Greetings Earthlings.

Greetings people. It's finally Friday again and I've got a couple of things I wanna highlight for you today as I have time. I'm going to do this bullet point style because frankly, I haven't had time or inspiration this week to really bring it in a full post. It's sort of a weekly recap of what's been going through my head. I hope you enjoy it.

The Grucci Family does it again.

• Happy 4th of July. Pretty much 'nuf said, right? I mean, we may not be perfect, but it could be worse. We could live in a place where paranoid lunatics run the show, as opposed to the merely stupid. The Grucci Family, who has been doing the Macy's Fireworks display for years really outdid themselves. Although the weather was as humid and miserable as you can get, the show was spectacular.

Mmmmmmm. Fried chicken skin.
You don't actually eat the meat do you?

• Really stupid lawsuit, part I: In an attempt to make The Colonel 'hip', the powers that be at YUM Brands (the co that owns Kentucky Fried Chicken, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell, etc) decided to upgrade him to appeal to ... I have no idea who. Check him out (via Gawker). This genius comes hot on the heels of a lawsuit that, pay attention now people, claims that KFC's fried chicken is not good for you. That's right people. That new diet you were going to go on that consisted of three buckets of KFC per day (plus bisquits and sides, naturally) might cause you to contract heart disease. Ahem. Um. Excuse me, but NO SHIT. Check out the story here. If you don't know that deep fried anything is bad for you, then frankly, you've got bigger issues than heart disease, so you might as well keep on eating the stuff. It is delicious, what can we say? The editorial staff here at Pedro's hearts us some good fried chicken and we'd eat it more often if 1) it wasn't terrible for you, and 2) it was socially acceptable.
  

Guess what douchebag?
You're not like Mike so get over it.

• Really stupid lawsuit, part II: This knucklehead named Allen Heckard, of Portland, Oregon, is suing Michael Jordan and Nike co-founder Philip Knight for - get this crazy ass number - $932 million because he claims he looks like MJ!! It's true! It's absolutely unbelievably true. AND IT IS DRIVING ME NUTS (actually more like this kind of Nuts)!!! $932 million! I'd love to know where he got that number!! I'm not sure who pisses me off more in this story, the guy or the lawyer who actually took the case. They are both huge parts of the problem and I hope MJ and Phil counter sue until they are both in the poor house. I can't comment further. This is the kind of shit that just makes my blood boil.
  
  
  

Pedro's NYC hearts Maria Sharapova
Ova and ova and ova!!

• RFed is unstoppable, Maria Sharapova not so much. Unfortunately I was unable to make the trip over to Wimbledon this year - that old work thing got in the way again. But it would appear that Roger Federer will win it again. The guy has not dropped a set in the entire tournament! The last guy to do that won a few tournaments himself. But, my homeboy from Espana is lookin pretty tight out there and this final is going to be something else. Check out these guns people! He totally out-studs Federer - it's not even close - and it's not because Roger's Swiss, either. It's simply that Rafi is more of a stud. Ask any girl - she'll agree, unless she thinks Maria Sharapova is hotter.

Advantage, Miss Sharapova

• Which she is. Because if we're going to boil this down to the strictly superficial, then let's cut to brass tacks. Maria Sharapova has forgotten more about hottness than the rest of the tour put together. We here at Pedro's love watching her ... play. Boo Yah!